Awestruck Comments - Open 25th March 2013, Closed 16th Sept 2013

Grace I loved the addition to the Maybe tales.
Only Kid and I know why he shot you a warning glance but who the heck is that blonde???

I'm still working on the maybes.

Riders - This was a fun little piece. I kept waiting for something bad to happen, but instead it was a pleasant little interlude of teasing. Nice.

Rosie Annie - I enjoyed reading this. You captured the voice of Caroline Porter very well. I do like a glimpse of happiness and everyday living in stories involving our favorite outlaws. Well done.

Remuda - I liked this very much. Unlike some, I don't find Annabelle teribly grating. She is naive and annoying, but also amusing in her clumsy attempts to make herself into something she is not. You caught her voice beautifully. I enjoyed the Kid's interactions with her and how he vacilates between irritation and teasing amusement, Well done.

Penski and Sister Grace - My, my, my. A little friendly competition to see who is better at battering, bruising, bashing and generally abusing the outlaws. Gotta say that you both did a bang up job of banging up Heyes and Curry. Good job--I think--but I feel guilty praising you for outlaw abuse.

Sister Grace - Aww... the Kid says good-bye and ready for his next adventure. Loved how you included all of the "Maybe" writers in your little farewell. Dang Kid was more interested in that blonde than in any us of.
Hmm... wait until I get my fingers tapping. I'll make him pay for that.

Sistergrace: Loved it! Poor Kid, is he really tired of being the love 'em and leave 'em type or MAYBE is he just having a hard time saying goodbye to you?

I'm a little late on this, but I've been on vacation. So, finishing up the May stories.....

Penski - I hope you plan on finishing this story! I gotta know what happens! Loved Heyes' entrance into the saloon. Liked all the info at the end.  Well done.


Frankie - Oh my! Another one that needs to be finished! To what extent were Kid's injuries, did they get the amnesty? So many questions left by you and Penski!

SisterGrace - What a cute story! Loved how you included all of this month's writers.

Maz - I loved this argument between the boys! Very much in character. I laughed when I found out where they were.

Riders - I thought this was a good stand alone story. I had no problem following it. Too bad each partner is too stubborn to send the first telegraph. So that's how Heyes met that Jim.

So they finally decided to try for amnesty....nice one Penski

Maz scribbles note that this one is not in the poll she has to do this month. Sheesh let's hope she gets that right!

Yay!  A new story, 3 1/2 weeks without a story -- so depressing.

Penski -- so impressed, not only that you have managed to write at least one story a month for so long, but also that you have managed to maintain the quality of the stories throughout.  That's a true achievement.  This one does not disappoint.  A very good version of the critical missing scene from the pilot -- how they decided to go for the amnesty.  This seemed so realistic and both boys in character (as well as Wheat and Kyle).  Really enjoyed it.  What a great ending to the dry spell.

Penski, I liked this very much. This feels like a missing scene from the pilot. You show us how Heyes and Curry might have made the decision to go for the amnesty. Both men were frustrated and bored with their lives. I think that's probably a good read on their feelings. They weren't motivated by nobility or regret. They needed to change what they were doing, and they found a way.

I also like the interplay between Heyes and Curry. In particular, I'm thinking of their arrival back at Devil's Hole, where Heyes almost drags Curry into bathing and eating, and the shooting practice. The dialogue illustrates their relationship very well.

Sister Grace, I don't know you at all, the person behind the alias here. Yet when I read  your stories, I detect an inner sweetness, a capacity to love, that shows through the characters you write. And I think, also, that your sensibilities may be more delicate than mine! I saw nothing shocking or un-PG here. What came through in this challenge entry was the desire of two people to find a happiness that neither really believe exists. I think you can tell that this story, although of a common genre, touched me on a deep level. I felt love, regret, and still, the belief that maybe love and happiness really are out there, far away, but attainable. A lot from a few words, huh?

Very funny, Calico! Borrowing their magic bags - what a great idea!

Have an awesome trip - I know you will!

Sistergrace...what a sweet tale of romance. I could really feel the love between these two. Loved the line A woman wanted things from a man, but they were things a wanted man could never give. Of course it can't be Kid because he only loves me, so it must have been Heyes right? Right? 


Callico. All my bags are packed I'm ready to go, I'm standing here outside the door. ....I'm leavin' on a jet plane. ....And leaving the boys here with us. Muhahha indeed!! Loved the story. I could see it all with your use of just a few words. They'll be fine with me...honest! AS Heyes said Would I lie to you? 

Oh Calico, I vote for "Kid Meets a Real Friendly redhead" for an upcoming challenge. Think of the possibilities! A man! A woman! A tabby! A Native American! The possibilities are endless . . . well, the possibilities are several, at least. And while you ponder future challenges, have a great time in the land where mosquitoes with the wing span of condors number in the billions. But not to worry: English people are the favored cheechakos in Alaska!
 

Rosieannie I was wondering who is this Elliot? What did he have to do with our boys and then all was revealed.  

Insideoutlaw...a separation story that reminds us once again how much the boys need each other and the trouble they get in when they are apart.

Nice ones ladies...and not too much for the poll setter to read! Now all you last minute wire dodgers take note!

I could get to like this POWER!!! 

Ghislaine - Oh, a story from the someday Part III saga!  Glad you gave us a sneak preview.  Love a Lom story!  Oh, he has a dilemma and trying to decide.  Love how the Kid picks up on it and asks him while Lom is shooting - great how intune Curry is with the gang to know something is amiss.  And then Heyes comes to the bunkhouse to check up on Lom and see if he can figure out what's going on.  Tricky how they get the gang away to see the book.  I can definitely see how HH & KC would be concern knowing what the book was about.  Really enjoyed how they parted company.  Now write the rest - it's summertime!

Ghislaine..at last we find out about Lom's time with the Devil's hole gang. I love the visual of Kid leaning against a tree...may have to go re-read that :)

A well defined tale and a great stand alone. Loved it.

Maz: Wonderful dialog, as always!  Love how you can make a complete story out of a single incident.  Though I think the last line wasn't really necessary.  These lines were my favorite: “We hafta do somethin’, Heyes. I am not gonna die in a cougar trap.” Heyes chuckled. “It’d be ironic though.” “No, it’d be stupid." But your signature line also fits in very well with this story!

Riders57: Apparently, I somehow missed your earlier story!   Sorry about that but I'll go read it soon as I can as I kept wondering about the backstories of the characters here.  I liked the way Kid downplayed his role in staving off the raiders, and then Tex's conversation with him later about ranching.  Kid was honorable about wanting to stick to the terms of the deal he'd made.  And Heyes meeting Jim Plummer for the first time: Nice!

Penski: Great meet up with Wheat at the beginning.  Love this exchange between the boys: “You goin’ to heat up a bath and make somethin’ for me to eat?”  “Well, no…” Oh!  What an interesting take on how they start their quest for amnesty.  Very different from other stories I've read.  Really liked the glimpses of life at the Hole, too.  Another great line: Hank was finally washing his clothes in the creek.

SisterGrace: I had to read the beginning three times before I realized that the creature beside Virginia, who was not a hen after all as I'd initially thought, was a human man!  Great line here: A woman wanted things from a man, but they were things a wanted man could never give. I think the story well conforms to the PG-13 rating.  It would be nice to know the backstory of Ginny and how Kid came to be there, as well as why Heyes was waiting for him at the end.  Yes, it was a little sappy but not overly so!

Calico: Great phrase here: …delightfully capacious – not to mention carry-on compliant…  Some luggage company could make a killing…  Um…what is the "spot on" gesture???  This was hilarious: “I’m dead,” despairs Kid.  And now I understand what folks in Chat meant this afternoon!  Excellent idea for a story, and I hope you're having a wonderful time in Alaska!

RosieAnnie: I knew there had to be significance to that line about the crops they grew in Texas, but I couldn't figure it out.  All through the story, I kept wondering what the connection to ASJ was.  Absolutely love the ending, when we find out!  This story was really sad and, I suspect, very realistic, as well.  I don't think I've ever read a story about Wheat's childhood before--good for you for thinking up something original.  Well done!

InsideOutlaw:  Great start--makes me continue reading (not that I wouldn't!) to find out who the narrator is.  I really like how you reveal the personality of the narrator through his thoughts.  Good line here: With those words, I had slammed the door on a lifelong partnership.  Ya know, at first I thought it was Heyes talking, and then I decided it was Kid.  But I'm glad it was Heyes because I like seeing him in situations that are out of his comfort zone, as it were, and seeing him react.  You did a really good job here, and the sheriff was a nice character, too.