Awestruck Comments - from 2nd May 2022

Kattayl - I LOVED this version of The Christmas Story by Dickens! I can see Heyes being arrogant and greedy, but hopefully not treat his cousin and partner so poorly (would the Kid really let him get away with that behavior). The ghosts of the Christmas were fun. Wonderful challenge!

I enjoyed this homage to Dickens- you addressed something that always made me roll my eyes- Scrooge not docking Bob's pay!
I can see Heyes being this money obsessed, but I would hope he'd not treat Kid so poorly, and genuinely hope that Kid wouldn't allow such treatment from his partner. But nicely done :)

Penski -- very nice tribute to your Aunt Kathy!  Hope some good memories do surface for Heyes like they did for Curry.

Lovely story Penski. Hope it helped you remember the best times with your aunt. Xx

A very happy new year to one and all
2022 has been 'Mixed' for so very many of us ... Wishing you all peace and friendship




Hello to you Kattayl


Oh I say, there is nothing like a Christmas Carol variant – pass me the extra Christmassy coffee and carry on…
Well, Heyes was always a touch on the larcenous side - smile

Awww … consider me misting as Kid feeds the old horse a tasty apple in the stables

Oh I say… Good to see Heyes back to loving his partner. Bless you for the christmasyness Kattayl



Hello to you faithful Penski

Aww, Thank you for sharing a tribute to your Aunt. Best wishes to you all, and may she indeed rest in peace.

Ah, you see, Denver is a NICE town for the boys to settle in

And the boys doing the right thing.
That was sad for all kinds of reasons, Penski – but touching too as they reconnect with the good memories.
Thank you.

rachel74: Loved your story. Bittersweet, not too many regrets which is good and they came through it together.

Rachel741 - Dang you're fast with a challenge! Prison? I can see them having to serve some time and it not being kind to either of them. Glad they made it out closer and with their sense of humor. I can definitely see them having no regrets about their careers. Curious what the next step will be. Wonderful challenge!

Thanks ladies. It came quickly as it's almost a sequel to another challenge from a while ago 'Fame.'

Leah Anders - Welcome to the wonderful world of writing challenges! I'm so excited you came to play with us! Heyes could get in a very dark mood. You made me nervous that he'd do something bad, but his partner kept him from going too deep. Loved the "speech" the Kid gave, looking at the glass as half full instead of half empty. Yep, have to get out and do something when depressed, even if you don't feel like it. Loved this one!

Thank you. I have to admit, in my eagerness to post, I wrote it quickly. Too quickly? Maybe. Still, it was fun!

Leah Anders. Oh very nice. I have a lot of sympathy for Heyes, I find this time of year makes me gloomy and he has even more reason to be. Glad he had Kid to pull him out of dwelling too much. Enjoyed this.

Rachel 741 - Regrets of the type of life they led and where it led, yes, they'd have a few. Like you implied in this story, there were good times as well. I really liked the following lines:

"The Kid sipped his drink then laughed softly. “While I'd sure like to change the middle, I ain't going to regret the beginning, and I'm hoping for a good ending.”

The knot in Heyes' stomach eased and he found a smile creeping back across his face as he raised his glass in a toast. “Now I can drink to that, Kid.”

The Kid took a sip out of his own drink before asking seriously. “What about you Heyes? Any regrets?”

“Just the one really, Kid...that we got caught, before the many Governor's of Wyoming got their collective heads out of their asses.”

Leah Anders - Welcome to the challenges. It was good to read a new story by you.

I can really empathize with Heyes here, having been in a deep funk myself this season. Luckily the Kid has some of his peoples philosopher's words of wisdom. The ending paragraph was a well written description of Heyes taking the first steps to pull himself our of his mood full of regrets. Nicely done.

Leah Anders


Superficially speaking you could say you wrote a nice contribution how lovely it is that Kid is able to dispel Heyes's dark mood and how sweet it is he manages to emphasize what good sides their change of life offered them since their separation from the DHG. In the longer term  the company of the members of the DHG were not adequate for the more intelligent Heyes and Curry.
There are always two sides of a coin.
To put it like that would be too plainly and simply.
Fortunately I am not content to see your story that simple.

I very much like your introduction. Sticking around each other every day, dealing with your partner's queernesses is never easy. If such one of them resolves into half an explosion of the respective other person, now that's a hint there's something up. More than once we can see the development of such a discussion in the series.
Starting from this point the main part enables you to explain the reason for Heyes's moodiness.
I can almost hear Heyes' more and more rising voice.
I like as well Kid's decision to return and his, for him, more uncommon way of handling the situation.
Great expression, "eloquent plea".

Now your plot is heading to its highlight.
That's what I like best.
"Just as Heyes was about to walk through the door, he stopped."
He is not yet ready to take a step over the threshold (to leave his regrets behind him, nevertheless he is showing his fake smile). His worries are still there but on this special day his partner needs him to keep up his confidence and he won't let him down.
That's what a friendship is for.... To be able to take a step back from your own frustration to support your friend even if that involves a little play-acting.

Beautiful moral of your story,
sometimes, "Regrets can wait for another day." A fine New Year's resolution for all of us.

Kattayl - With as many times as they hit their heads by falling off a horse or getting hit behind or in a fight, it wouldn't surprise me that dementia would be the result. I love that they're still together in their old age. Sweet that that Clementine got to have both of them and has a daughter from each of them. She's a saint to care for her ex-husbands / best friends in their "golden" years. Kinda sad, but I still loved it.

Kattayl- oh that's sad but sweet
Penski- I do love hearing about Sam and Joe- nicely done :)

I really enjoyed reading this Ms. Penski. Happy to see Joe and Sam doing well, and good to know that at least one of them was in touch with Clem. Would like to red Elliot's story. Loved the end with the older men wondering if they had any outlaws living around them.

Kattyl


A story closer to reality than to fanfiction....
You really fooled me with your headline and the subsequent text. Actually, I was so confused I returned to the beginning and started anew.

I very much like all those small things you mentioned which go along with an advanced age.
Some good ones and perhaps a little more bad ones:
   a.to sit in a comfortable overstuffed chair
   b.a warm, crackling fire around us
   c.to acknowledge and enjoy the need for a sense of safety
   d.a sore back, pains in the lower back a hurting knee
   e.gaining weight...
   f.forgetting where you have put things

Post amnesty is usually not my most favorite timeline. The idea that my heroes, known to me at their best age, could get older than every ordinary person, affected me with mixed feelings.
But they were set off by the humorous way you have written the story.
Senility doesn't stop at famous, lovable ex-outlaws and you are so correct by making use of the fact that they still have their long-term-memories but with increasing frequency they are losing their short-term-memory.

I like the way you let us know something about their past, well done.
You would win the heart of every geriatric nurse by Clementine's decision to take them for a ride to make them tired and lose their actual restlessness - the best concurrent validation you can offer in such a situation!

Hello one and all,
Consider me mildly excited and pleased to see several stories in the pot this month

Slurps tea (if only I had tea)


1) Hello Rachel

Oh dear, two years in gaol – still that could have been far, far worse.

Now, don’t we all love just a duologue between the boys?

And, of course they regret the getting caught – smile.

Dear Kid, may we all thump him on the back as he coughs


2) Leah_Anders

Hello there Leah!
Now, my listing is far from perfect – if this is first challenge, welcome.
If it is just first for – ooh, ages, - still welcome

And we start off with another duologue, lovely.
Aww, poor Heyes, feeling the months and years slipping away.

Dear, dear Kid – he is so right, lots of adventures – roughly one a week – and meeting interesting folks.

Oh bless, and Heyes is joining in with a brave face because he knows the Kid needs him.
There is nothing like a two-hander, huh?

3) Kattayl
Hello to you, Kattayl

Oh no! Are both our boys getting forgetful and confused? I will sniffle if yes.

Now, I have to buckle my belts on looser holes these days. Comfortable – yeah, that is a nice word for it.

So Clem married them BOTH – that is just greedy.

This is sad. Well, bittersweet. We are all on the same aging path, aren’t we?
Well done on NOT overplaying the sadness, Kattayl. Sniff.


4) Penski


And hello to you Penski

Oh sheesh, can I ever remember the extra aliases?

I think the Kid did the right thing, letting Clem know. You need more than one friend to care where you are.

Poor old Lom, that is two stories running where he is gone.

LOVING the Gilligan cut from them agreeing NO, then Eliot about to arrive.

And here we are, getting the potted history we know. Wistful, nostalgic sigh.

Oh, and our boys are regretting some of the harm they did and trying to make amends. Bless them.

And Clem sent the photo – I LOVE that.

VERY nice short there, Penski

Penski

Good introduction, it is easy to imagine a worked up ex-outlaw.
I like that, as always, Kid is able to take the wind out of Heyes's sails.
I am tempted[/b] to say he wished 'the cooling gentle breeze' on the porch would calm his partner additionally...

Good usage of punctuation to accentuate raised voices in order to make them audible and to give the reader an impression of the atmosphere.
I like the idea that even in the best, oldest partnerships there are small secrets.

Although they have changed into 'good citizens', I assume there is still a little pride of having been 'famous' in the past and together with a certain feeling of obligation towards Clementine, why they are helping Elliot.
Wise words of regrets - wrong decisions and the acknowledgement of the impacts of their deeds, well now at their age they are mostly more 'good' than bad men.
Nevertheless I am a little sad about the statement, 'Heyes and Curry are gone.'
And with Clementine's gifted picture they can burn the bridges behind themselves completely - sniff. But all least they are alive and together.

Leah Anders - What a wonderful challenge to the prompt "Not Paying Twice."  I love how the young girl got the Kid twice with her shenanigans, as her pa calls it.  What an appropriate name for her, too.  Very enjoyable read!  

Penski: Oh this was fun I enjoyed it a lot :)

Kattayl - I really enjoyed this glimpse into the blacksmith shop.  You really made Mr. Bremerton someone I loved to hated - he was evil and enjoyed it.  Like how Chrissy supported Jed and Heyes' words from Gramma Curry.  Wonderful challenge!  

1) Leah_Anders

Hello to our first challenge out of the traps

Ah, the annual fair ! And it is not even July 4th

Well, I think pay up, Kid. That innocent looking little gal has done you.
And bless your heart – is she going to do it twice?
And she’s rich
Oh, this is good, Leah. Mind you, she did have Heyes working in her corner on the persuasion
Clapping hard here – very well told


2) Penski

Hello there mistress of words

Oooh, chicken, green beans and mash – I could eat that.

Well, that is just mean of the livery owner. (Unless of course he forgot – I forget all sorts these days.)

Awww – bless. The Sherriff knows Hank’s old tricks though.


3) Kattayl

And hello to you, multiple bandanny winner

Ooh so this time it the Kid not getting paid.

Well done, Kid! Awwwwww…. And he gets appreciated too.

First of all, I was fascinated that in each of the contributed stories Kid was the one who paid twice.
Why is that so?
On my opinion it's lovely to imagine Kid's face by realizing he was scammed. The disbelief, accompanied by the fact that he can't use his gun to achieve justice. He doesn't have enough law-abiding measures to chose from.
This month every story would deserve to be voted for... What a shame we only have one vote!



1)   Leah Anders

Can a name be a bad omen? Funny idea.
I love Kid's child-like joy to visit the fair. Unfortunately his good mood changed. His torness by realizing his dilemma during the debate with the salesman is well written. As well as your description to point out the contrast of the different atmospheres. You used fitting expressions and adjectives which enable the reader to get a vivid picture of the scene.
Splendid to imagine, this time he has to fight on his own, no back up from the amused silver-tongue.
Good characteristics of Heyes rubbing even more salt into the wound.
Moral of the story, for me, is Kid  learned his lesson with the help of his partner what really matters in life, better to pay twice than to lose your countenance. I'm sure after a while he will be able to laugh the lecture.

2)   Penski

Whenever I read a story from you I feel at home - you always manage to capture the ASJ spirit right to the point.
Some things in their time line were harder than in modern times, some easier. In this case I am not sure which one to chose...
Getting a receipt is safer than to rely on one's word, the possibility to negotiate charge and service you are getting is certainly an advantage - unless you are a stranger or transient.
For ex-outlaws on the run yet it is not always the wisest thing to stand their ground, even if it is justified.
I very much like your idea that everything can be turned against men without rights - sad but true. Also, the law-abiding but cheating livery owner got away with his scum and the boys have to high tail it out of town once more... Welcome in our ASJ world! Perfectly done!

3)   Kattyl

I am not acquainted with the universe of Winter's Refuge but it seems to be a post amnesty time-line you are referring to.
Kid has an honest but back breaking job. At least he has the physical constitution for it, very probably gained even more muscles!
What I like best is that his character has developed a lot.
Although he still does not like to be insulted, he reacts more patiently and is able to rein in his former hot temper in order to handle uncomfortable situations.
I like that you describe his inner feelings which belie his poker face and true emotions.
I am glad he is able to preserve his dignity as a not wanted man anymore - there will always be someone who will make you feel inferior (or makes you pay twice).
Beautiful, fitting idiom you quoted,. "Fool me once, shame on you, Fool me twice shame on me".
Moral: each person can learn to live honest, to swallow mean things and find a way to deal with it.

Dan Ker wrote:

First of all, I was fascinated that in each of the contributed stories Kid was the one who paid twice.
Why is that so?
On my opinion it's lovely to imagine Kid's face by realizing he was scammed. The disbelief, accompanied by the fact that he can't use his gun to achieve justice. He doesn't have enough law-abiding measures to chose from.
This month every story would deserve to be voted for... What a shame we only have one vote!



1)   Leah Anders

Can a name be a bad omen? Funny idea.
I love Kid's child-like joy to visit the fair. Unfortunately his good mood changed. His torness by realizing his dilemma during the debate with the salesman is well written. As well as your description to point out the contrast of the different atmospheres. You used fitting expressions and adjectives which enable the reader to get a vivid picture of the scene.
Splendid to imagine, this time he has to fight on his own, no back up from the amused silver-tongue.
Good characteristics of Heyes rubbing even more salt into the wound.
Moral of the story, for me, is Kid  learned his lesson with the help of his partner what really matters in life, better to pay twice than to lose your countenance. I'm sure after a while he will be able to laugh the lecture.

find a way to deal with it.

Thank you for the insightful and thoughtful comments!  It's nice to hear what others think about one's attempts to paint a written picture.  :)